my christmas wish...

Tis' the season, and once again i'm find myself disgruntled to the point of near insanity.  Not, that humans aren't dispicable all year-round, but there is just something special about the holidays that can bring out the worst in  some people, or is it the worst in me?  Don't get me wrong, i quite enjoy the x-mas season, though i'm not a x-ian, but never am i more mindful of the sad state of the human condition than in the latter part of the Christian year. 

As i work in retail, i annually find myself on the front lines of the battle for bargains.  Now, anyone who saw the footage on the news of the madness at Walmarts across the land this year, knows of what i speak.  People trampling-- no stampeeding over people to get a lousy computer that may not figuratively cost an arm and a leg, but literally, very well may cost the whole of a body (just not theirs)!  To be sure, some retailers, may not do much to help the situation, but the natural evilness, the selfishness, thoughtless, inconsiderate nature of homosapiens can never fully be curtailed, but for a bullet to the head or heart. 

You come into my store and tear it up!  Nevermind that you disrepect the empolyees who made the store nice for you in the first place-- no, it is our job to serve you and to recover the disorder of a shopthrough.  We know this.  We understand this.  But what of the inconsiderateness to others?  Your fellow consumers?  Your fellow humans?  Now there aren't nearly enough of us employees to promptly correct all that you've thrown into disarray.  No, no-one is asking that things be re-folded in the manner in which you found them, but can we not throw the "goods" on the floor, lest they become "bads".  I can't count how much merchandise i come arcoss, that though as yet unpurchased, most be marked out-of-stock because it is no longer in a like-new condition.  To that end, don't let your kids play with shit, until you've bought it.  Quit giving your kids wares you've no intention of buying them just to shut them up.  I know they'll end up breaking it, if they're old/strong enough or at the very least cover it it a thick film of toddler saliva, if they still be so young.  You are horrible parents. 

By the way, if you open up an package to check out the merchandise, and approve said merchandise for your purchasing pleasure, take the one you opened instead of then putting it back for an untouched one.  You're gonna rip it open at home and discard the packaging anyway, you dumb-asses!!!

What of the little old lady who tripped this year on the shit you left on the ground and hit her head on the corner of the display table?  She was carted away in an ambulance, but give you a second thought to your carelessness?  Care you not for the safety of others?

If you pick something up that you've chosen not to purchase, how about putting it back where you found it?  At least in the general area (except the floor).  Maybe then the next person can find what they're looking for.  Have some respect!!! If it's aready on the floor, i apolgize, but can we not walk or run our carts over it, please, you fucks!

And quit fighting with other customers for Christ's sake!  If you leave the line with out asking someone to hold your place, get to the back!  And yes, expect the long lines, and huge crowds.  You know how it is.  It's the same every year.  Don't be surprised or get angry, because you're in a hurry-- there's no such thing as a hurry in a mall in December. 

Finally, to those of you who are shopping until--or worse yet--start shopping at the last minute, don't give me attitude because the selections have been picked over, it ain't my fault, buddy.  You should've gotten your ass up n' out long ago.  You take what's left and keep yer mouth shut!  Don't make me jump across this counter and smack you up side your head!

Every year it's the same-- so why am i not used to it?  My christmas wish is this: i hope all of you stupid, inconsiderate, malevolent beings whom make me and others miserable during the holidays promptly die and go straight to hell.  Do not pass Go, do not collect two hundred dollars, just go straight to hell.  And may your hell, be an eternal Day-After-Thanksgiving shift at a bargain basement retailer.  May you fold the same sweater a million times infinity, may you incure the wrath of all who find it inbetween foldings, that they may let you know of the horrible state of the store--and your eternal condition for that matter. merry fucking christmas! :)

Sneaky Devil

awesome nite last night:
had tix to see Depeche Mode @Staples.
snuck into a line of people who were gonna meet the band before the show.  no-one noticed and we got a pass to go in.  met the guys took a pic.  then snuck onto the floor for better seats.
great show, awesome nite!